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How Do You Treat Your Body? {+ 3 Steps How To Love It}

Love your body

 

The other night, I went out to see a couple of bands play, and ended up stayed over at a friend’s place. It’s been a while since I’ve been out and about at night, bar-hopping and dancing with fresh-faced boys and girls, barely out of high school, and it struck me how unaware people generally are, of their bodies.

 

bod·y
/ˈbädē/

Noun
The physical part of a person.
The entire material or physical structure of an organism.

Synonyms
corpse – flesh – trunk – carcass

 

The next morning the two of us were giggling and re-hashing our experience over tahini balls and cups of tea, remembering…

The middle-aged woman, who clearly went out of her way to dress up: in a pair of sports shorts, with stockings, and the widest bra strips known to man poking out of her too-tight singlet vest. The awkward Irish guy who tried to chat us up and had appalling BO. The hilarious, elderly, female bouncer who “got down” with us and tried to do some kind of funny hip-grind dance move with us. The young girl, with too much makeup, her far-too-short skirt pulled up too high — who’s mere presence scream “I’m a sweet good girl, but I’m insecure and don’t know how to love myself!”

 

It’s a long, strange trip to be inside a body, to have a body, to want to be somebody, to have a belief about your body, true or not. To identify with it, live with it, understand it. To love it or hate it. To take care of it or destroy it. Yearning for someone to love you for more than your body. Or, in spite of it. | TIM VENABLE

 

How we think of and treat our bodies is an external reflection of how we expect the world to treat us. We are putting out subconscious messages about what we believe we are worthy of, by the way we dress, stand, interact, and look after ourselves. especially our bodies.

Any process of transformation and empowerment must begin from its foundations. The foundation that we all have in our lives is our bodies. Our bodies are the physical manifestation of our physical experience and therefore, the groundwork to all that you experience.

Marianne Williamson, author of Return to Love, says love must be present in every area of your life, including your relationship with people and your body. “If you’re a compulsive over-eater, or try to control your body and life with food or exercise in any other way, you don’t have a loving relationship: you have an obsessive relationship.” She continues “You don’t know how to receive, so you keep grasping for more.”

 

HOW DO YOU TREAT YOUR BODY?

Observe the way you treat your body. This will give you clues on how you treat yourself in other areas of your life. Do you love, treasure and nurture your body? Do you listen when it wants to tell you something? Do you FEEL into your body for insights? Or do you neglect it, override what it’s saying to you and bombard it with negative beliefs and self talk?

Notice when you feel hungrier or lose your appetite. Notice when you feel discomfort or pain in your body anywhere. What else is going on in your life at the same time? Consider the implications of what your body is trying to tell you about yourself + your life.

The way you treat your body is reflected by how you experience yourself + your life. And you want to feel good, whole, loved and happy right?

 

LET’S DO SOMETHING CRAZY

Lets resolve to love our bodies! What if we took all of that self-loathing, that shame, that judgment we derive from the size and shape of our bodies and we left it behind? What if we stopped berating ourselves when we catch our image in the mirror and find whatever tiny part of ourselves to criticise? From now we resolve that self-worth is no longer connected to one’s waistline. No more fad diets. No more holiday binges. In their place: love and appreciation for our bodies’ beauty and capabilities. A healthy, balanced lifestyle which bows in respect to the miracle that is your body.

 

STOP COMPARING

Turn off the TV, close those magazines and stop comparing yourself to others. Start listening to what your body is telling you. When its hungry. When it’s tired. What nutrients it’s lacking. In what ways it wants to move. What you’re really feeling. Nurture yourself. Take baths. Take your time. Be gentle with yourself. Get a massage. Go see a nutritionist, naturopath or holistic healer of your choice.

 

STAY CONNECTED

Stay connected with your body. It may feel uncomfortable at first, because it’s a new sensation but stay with it. Love it, cherish it and adore it more than you have ever loved anything. Bring awareness into those moments when you happen to fall back into your old patterns of self-berating. Accept that this is part of your journey into loving your body and then change your thoughts by apprehending them with love + kindness. Your power will grow from falling in love with yourself + your body all over again.

 

3 STEPS TO LOVE YOUR BODY

CREATE SPACE
+ Observe yourself in action when you start to mistreat or berate your body. Take the time to really listen + hear what your body is telling you. What is really going on?
+ What are your main body qualms? When and why did you start believing this about your body? What do you do when you neglect or punish your body and what is the trigger?
+ Write out a long list of ways you can start loving your body right now.

 

RELEASE + FORGIVE
+ Write a letter, journal or draw your forgiveness process now. Let yourself and anyone else who may have said or done horrible things to you in the past, off the hook. Let it all out until the tears have stopped streaming down your face and you can feel your body soften in love and gratitude. Complete your forgiveness process with a promise to yourself.

 

SET INTENTIONS
+ Choose 3 habits that you are going to let go of during the next 3 months. You are going to say NO out of love for your body.
+ Choose 3 new habits that you are going to integrate into your life over the next 3 months. Make sure it’s something that your body will really love!!
+ Write out how, in our ideal world, you would like your body to FEEL.

3 Responses to How Do You Treat Your Body? {+ 3 Steps How To Love It}

  1. I can’t say how timely this is for me. I’m a health coach with a growing belly and I’ve had my grievances with it despite my efforts. Last night I took a relaxing bath and realized for the first time that I no longer hate or dislike my body but rather feel concerned. I’ve studied the manipura chakra and felt ready to make a promise to myself that I will help my body through whatever it’s going through. The more my belly gets in the way the more it needs help, and I’ve been ignoring that. This article has inspired me to really make an intent to create a healing space for it. Thank you for this!! You are truly my favorite blog!
    Bethany

    • Ah, sweet Bethany, how wonderful that you are opening up a sacred space to listen to your body as it takes you through an in-depth healing journey! One thing I do want to add is to be aware that our bellies are the emotional centres of our lives and bodies. Often when there is a lot of emotional suppression and neglect going on, after some time our stomachs respond by expanding and distending. Of course there’s a physical aspect of it too, but start paying attention to really feel ing and processing or ‘digesting’ your emotions. it will make huge difference. Love you! x

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Where Is My Mind?

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“No matter what is happening in our lives, we choose how we wish to think about it. And the greatest gift we give ourselves is often our willingness to change our minds. Despite what might seem to be the saddest and most intractable situation, we have the power to believe that something else is possible, that things can change, that a miracle can happen.” | MARIANNE WILLIAMSON

 

I was having a re-epiphany last night. Obviously a re-epiphany is what happens when you remember to remember a piece of wisdom that has momentary escaped you. Which is that, in every single moment, I get to choose how I experience life, by the thoughts that I think.

I’ve had a cold for about a week now, which means, that while I was busy being sick, a whole heap of cruddy, complain-y, disgruntled and unappreciated thoughts have decided to huddle up and take refuge in my mind, while playing themselves on repeat, without my consent. And all of a sudden, I thought “What the hell?! Why am I thinking these thoughts? These are not the kind of thoughts I want in my world! WHERE IS MY MIND!?”

 

mind
/mīnd/

Noun
The element of a person that enables them to be aware of the world and their experiences, to think, and to feel; the faculty of consciousness.

Synonyms
intellect – thought – opinion – wit – sense – notion

 

Your mind is your greatest tool. It gives you the power, the freedom and the ability to create any kind of life you want to. Your thoughts are incredibly powerful, + as with every powerful tool, the power + wisdom lies in knowing how to use it.

Here’s the premise: every thought you think makes a difference.

Are you using your thoughts and using the power of the mind consciously, or are you throwing any old kind of thoughts around without consideration of their effect?

Your power lies in your ability to choose thoughts that are in alignment with who you really are {an incredible, inspiring + unique creature, clearly!} and what you want to experience.

Let’s start with the basics. According to scientists in quantum physics, physical reality is made up of vibrations of energy, and your thoughts too, are vibrations of energy. Your thoughts have a powerful influence; they affect what happens to you. To know this is to know something great.

You harness the power of your mind by directing your thoughts toward a desired outcome. Put simply, what you focus on you attract. Your thoughts are the primary creative forces in your life. Your thoughts are creating your reality! But that’s good because you can CHOOSE what thoughts to have.

 

How?

  1. Bring awareness to the thoughts you think.
  2. Bring acceptance and forgiveness into that awareness with you.
  3. Be willing to change negative thoughts instantly and replace them with positive ones.

Awakening to this truth, the way to an empowered life becomes crystal clear. Train your conscious mind to think thoughts of success, happiness, health, prosperity, and to weed out negativity such as fear and worry. Keep your conscious mind busy with the expectation of the best, and make sure the thoughts you habitually think are based upon what you want to see happen in your life.

 

So I have re-commitment to myself to be aware of my thoughts. I know from experience that when I pay attention to what thoughts I am thinking consistently, and find ones that aren’t in alignment with where and whom I’d like to be, I can choose to replace them with new thoughts. And by doing this consistently, I change, not only my thoughts, but also my entire life experience.

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It’s 6.52am. This Is Where I’m At Right Now.

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It’s 6.52am. I’ve been pottering around for about half an hour – slowly moving around the house, putting on clothes, washing my face, drinking a tea, putting away the dishes from last night’s dinner – slowly preparing myself physically and mentally for the day ahead. My first coaching calls starts in half an hour, and today is one of my biggest ‘work’ days, so I am finding sanctuary in the early morning stillness before it all begins.

 

You might remember that about a month and a half ago, I began my trek North to the tropics of Far North Queensland, Australia, with a few adventures and mishaps along the way. I’ve been here 3 and a half weeks now, and while it’s definitely heating up for the monsoon and cyclone season, at this particular time of the morning everything is still so fresh and cool from the night. I love these hours that I have a lone before the rest of my household and world wakes up.

 

I came to Cairns for 2 reasons.

Firstly, exactly 10 years ago I received my degree in Psychology here, after 4 years of studying at the James Cook International University. And I had always promised to return. I suppose now was the time. It’s such a familiar, gentle, easy affair. Despite the heat, I’m starting to think that I want to stay longer.

Secondly, I came because I was offered a beautiful home to house-sit for 6 weeks. Situated up high in the rainforest, overlooking the city, I feel so blessed to be surrounded by a stream of peace and stillness in this part of the world. The time is passing quickly – too quickly – and I know in 3 weeks it’s time to move on again.

 

My original plan (before my van died) was to leave this wet, hot climate early to mid-December and make my way down south to Byron or even Sydney for the New Year. Now, things feel kind of different. There’s a man in my life whom I want to factor into my decisions, and while he is happy to join me on my gypset journeys, he is a more settled creature than I, so things are happening a little bit more slowly. Which I really, really like. It means that I get to focus my time and energy on other things than the journey – such as my business and where I am taking that as we come into the New Year.

 

I love this time of the year, for exactly that reason. It’s a time where we get to look back, take stock and see how far we have come. This year, for me, has been tremendous. It held many, many challenges, I wept many tears along the way, and simultaneously took enormous risks and grew as a woman, a human being, and an entrepreneur. It was all systems go, and while sometimes I felt like I was stuck in the very-fast-spin-cycle of life at times, now, as I take a breath and look around, it all makes sense.

 

So what’s next? I’ve actually got a second house-sit arranged to take me through to the first week of January. That’s about as much forward planning as I need to do right now. In the meantime, I am going to get very, very clear on the direction that I’d like my life to take in the next 6 to 12 months, and start paving the way towards my lofty dreams.

Yep, it’s 6.52am. This is where I’m at right now.

 

What about you? Where are you at right now? And what’s next?

2 Responses to It’s 6.52am. This Is Where I’m At Right Now.

    • I love YOU and yes, of course I will! I’ll definitely be coming to visit you – I actually can’t wait and can’t stop thinking about it! xo

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10 Reasons Why You Should Join Us for Gypset Mindset Right Now. {Doors Close Tonight}

 

Gypset Mindset mentoring program

 

10 Reasons Why You Should Join Us for Gypset Mindset Right Now. {Doors Close Tonight}

 

1.

I created the Gypset Mindset 6 week mentoring program as a response to the top most recurring themes and issues that I’ve worked through with my coaching clients in the past two years. I noticed that very similar concerns kept showing up, and decided that create a program to address them so that everyone could have access to the tips, tools and information, no matter what.

 

It’s about having resources that you can access at any time, as well as 1 to 1 support with me to guide you through process of becoming who you want to (and are meant to) be.

 

2.

This 6 week mentoring program is for you, if:

  • are PASSIONATE and INSPIRED
  • are WILLING TO DO THE WORK
  • WALK THE TALK and get things done
  • want to go BEYOND YOUR LIMITS
  • are ready to go OUTSIDE OF YOUR COMFORT ZONE
  • have INTEGRITY and a POWERFUL VISION or DREAM

 

3.

What you’ll get is:

  • 6 x 50 min 1 to 1 coaching calls with me over the 6 week program.
  • 6 x support emails to keep you focused.
  • 6 x PDF’s full of content to guide your way.
  • Free copies of all of my digital products:

Guided Self-Hypnosis MP3

Guided Self-Love Meditation MP3

Build Your Own Business Blog eBook

The Gypset Recipe eBook

The Gypset Guide to Releasing Rituals 7 Day Program

 

4.

What you’ll really love about the Gypset Mindset program is that is a hand-held journey. We begin by settling into your centre to find your truth. Then we will build a foundation for your dreams and aspirations and life. One that will support you the whole way. And finally the last few weeks are spent creating a plan for you to take action on and take out into world, in a creative and pragmatic way.

It’s a perfect beginning to a fantastic new year. With 2015 just around the corner, this time brings tremendous possibilities to recreate just about everything in your life.

 

5.

What will surprise you the most, is just how bespoke and intuitive our 1 to 1 coaching calls are. Even though we will be following the structure of the program, this is essentially about you. Which means that we are going to look into specifically what it is that you need, right in that moment. Yep, it’s all about you. So every call will be different, flexible and approached by a sense of presence, centered-ness and being in the moment.

 

6. 

Curious about what folks think about working with me in my mentoring programs? Here is just one of the beautiful comments:

 

Vienda, a note of thanks. I’m getting a lot of out this program and you should KEEP DOING IT!

I’m sure it takes a lot of energy on your part, but it seems to be working really well and it definitely holds a lot of value for your clients. I love that you bring your WHOLE self to your coaching.

That is what people need – not streamlined systems that don’t leave room for adaptation, quick thinking, and thoughtful tailoring.” | Anne, USA.

 

7.

I have been working in this field, and tested it all out on myself, every step of the way, for over 10 years. See, I practice what I preach, and I would never share anything, unless I have tried it, and has worked for me. All the concepts that I share in the Gypset Mindset program are based on years of research, inner work, experimentation, mediation and making mistakes. Over the years, I have come to see that life is so much more simple – if we let it be. And I want to pass that on.

I want you to know, that you have the resources and ability to create the life of your dreams. Because that’s what I have discovered for myself. We all have it. We just need to learn how.

 

8.

Want to know what it costs to join?

  • In this special, this-year-only deal, the entire mentoring program is only 2 payments of $297.
  • The #GypsetMindset program is valued at $1,250 including the 6 coaching sessions, all the program materials as well as the digital products and resources.
  • Saving you a total of $656 which is way over 50% off its value.
  • Your first payment is due now upon enrolment, and your second payment will be due on Monday 1st December.

 

9.

It all begins: TONIGHT. I’ll be sending the first email with all the details and free bonuses and an introduction to the program at 8pm AEST tonight.

 

10.

Ready? Right now, I want you to read the details here, and then sign up for the program, right here.

 

Can’t wait to see you on the flip-side (inside the Gypset Mindset program) my lovely! xo

 

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How To Follow Your Heart. In 8 Awesome Ways.

 

Your heart is like an inner GPS. It has the ability to guide you through the world, and nudge you toward your purpose. It’s also interchangeable for you intuition. Usually, the heart speaks through your intuition. Your heart gives it a voice that you can comprehend.

 

When you follow your heart, you increase the joy, happiness, and fulfillment in your life.

 

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FOLLOW YOUR HEART

When I talk about following your heart, I’m not referring to your physical heart, clearly.  Although I’m sure it plays a part.

I’m pointing to the area in the middle of your chest, because that is often where I feel the energy that I call my heart, and that most people refer to when they tell you to listen to your heart.

It’s also known as the fourth chakra, the heart chakra. It is often associated with love, wisdom, and compassion.

 

We could spend time theorizing about what it does and how it works, but what I care about is that it helps me live a passionate, purposeful, and fulfilling life.

 

I default to listening to my inner GPS, not to an external source, even if it is family, friends, or world-renowned expert. I know what is needed in my life. If I blindly follow advice from others, I’ll end up unhappy, because no one can know what will work for me.

 

The reason most people aren’t living like this is because it’s been drummed out of them.

 

“We’ve been told that we should make logical decisions, and that everything should make sense. But if you’ve been on this planet for a while, you know that you can’t really make sense of life. You can’t figure life out.”

 

So following your heart means listening to your inner guidance. We all have a guidance system within us waiting to help us. But we have to be willing to listen.

 

I also had to learn to listen to my body and heart when it came to making decisions.

 

To rely on feelings, however, can be challenging. Most of us are switched off to our primal instincts, and instead, let fear, pack mentality and society’s expectations dictate our paths.

 

I have been lured by the sweet promise of safety and security, at my soul’s detriment, and have come very close to settling for a life that was far removed from the one I dreamed of and the one I feel I deserve.

 

Sometimes the wrong decision is disguised as the easiest. It’s a little trick our minds like to play on us to lull us into a false sense of security.

 

Our minds seek comfort. Our hearts seek truth.

 

 

WHAT IT DOESN’T MEAN

Listening to your heart doesn’t mean that all of the challenges and problems in your life disappear.

 

It doesn’t mean that suddenly you’re happy 100% of the time. It means that you start living life more holistically. You live life through your whole being.

 

And it doesn’t mean that you wage war with your mind. It means that your mind becomes a servant to your heart, but you still see your mind for the useful tool that it is.

 

People may say that following your heart is impractical, but what’s even more impractical is thinking that you can control life and force it to bend to your will. Being practical means living your life with your whole being. That means using both your mind AND your heart.


What happens when we need to make big, life-impacting decisions? Fear takes over, the voices in our head get loud and bossy and urge us to avoid taking risks. Our ego tries desperately to con us into taking the easy way out.

 

We, therefore, don’t often make our choices from the heart, we make them from the mind space which governs much of our lives and tends to try to keep us small.

 

Our worried minds are not on our sides. Anything that favors fear over love is not an ally of mine. If 60-80% of our thoughts each day are negative, how do we learn to make decisions based on what is truly best for us rather than what is easiest, or avoid making the wrong choices based on fear?

 

WHAT IT DOES MEAN

“I believe in intuitions and inspirations… I sometimes ‘feel’ that I am right. I do not ‘know’ that I am.” | Albert Einstein

 

When a choice is made based on a deep and instinctual knowing felt in our gut or heart, we tend to find that the outcome is beneficial for ourselves and our life path. Our bodies are our greatest and wisest guides.

 

We simply need to learn to recognize and listen to their quiet wisdom, rather than the misleading chitter-chatter of our mind. This way, we will be following a deeper calling — an instinctual and soul-driven knowledge that whatever it is we are drawn to is ultimately the best opportunity for us.

 

You know those pieces of undeniable wisdom which seem to speak out loud at 3 am? That is our higher self communicating, often when you least expect it. It is our inner guru — the you within you, the divine within… our celestial soul.

 

“We have five senses in which we glory and which we recognize and celebrate, senses that constitute the sensible world for us. But there are other senses — secret senses, sixth senses, if you will — equally vital, but unrecognized, and unlauded.” | Oliver Sacks

 

8 AWESOME WAYS TO FOLLOW YOUR HEART

 

So how do we distinguish between the wise voice inside which speaks the truth and the voice which keeps us small and prevents us from being bold?

 

1. Breathe. Our breath is the single most effective way of connecting with our bodies — and therefore, our truth. Joining the space between our bodies and souls opens up a communication channel from which we can learn ideas, inspiration and truths behind choice.

When it all seems too much to handle, when you’re stuck between a rock and a hard place, sit and breathe… what do you feel? Go deeper within, keep breathing and you may feel a gentle pull towards what’s best.

 

2. Trust Yourself. Our friends and families want the best for us. They want us to be happy, but Only You know what’s best for You. Our friends might think they know the answers based on their unique experiences, and our families might advise us based on their need to protect us.

Both are wonderful sources of support, but neither have the answers you need to make that decision. If you go against the advice of everyone around you, that’s fine; it’s your choice, and your heart is leading you on your own special journey.

 

3. Look for the signs. Often we overlook subtle synchronicities which are there to guide us down the best path. I believe that such signs are actually our subconscious trying to communicate with our conscious self. We should pay attention to coincidences and make note of subtle symbols which might lead us to discover a more authentic life choice which is truly best for us.

 

4. Smile and let go. Sometimes, when faced with the hardest decisions, we put so much pressure on ourselves to do what’s right that we forget to realize that life is a beautiful ride and is made up of a series of experiences. The choices we make are never wrong — they simply contain the lessons we need to grow as people and be the best we can be.

Know that whatever happens, as a consequence of our actions, will always be the best for us, at that time. Smile, trust, surrender and enjoy the ride.

 

5. Know that the Universe wants the best for you. Sometimes we have to let go and surrender to the flow of life. We like to be in control of the little fleshy spaceship we call our bodies, but our bodies will operate with or without our instruction. We will keep on breathing, our heart will keep on beating.

The Universe is a complex, intelligent and loving organism, and I’m pretty sure that if it can create planets and stars, then it can guide us on the right course.

 

6. Move. When water stands still, it becomes stagnant. Similarly, our lives become stale if we become physically stuck. When faced with a big decision, the worst thing we can do is let it paralyze us; we must keep moving. It doesn’t matter where, just move your body.

Those energies shifting inside, when we release our bodies from the shackles of stillness, may just release the answers we are looking for.

 

7. Create. Sometimes my biggest revelations have come about whilst writing. I let my fingers hit the keyboard, and as I start to type, it quickly becomes a stream of consciousness which can often reveal the answers I was pondering.

Creativity is a direct line of communication between your heart and the world. If you paint, write or build, get lost in creating and your heart might just speak her truth via the medium of your art.

 

8. Experiment with being aware of your heart. Bring your attention to the centre of your chest, and notice what goes on.

There’s nothing else you need to do. If you’ve never connected to your heart, or if it’s been a long time, you may notice some anxiety or fear there. If you do, feel it fully, and stay with it. That’s the only way to let it go.

 

“Intuition is seeing with the soul.” | Dean Koontz

 

Don’t forget that my last mentoring program for 2014 starts on Monday and doors close tomorrow. Join me for 6 weeks of Gypset Mindset now!

 

Image found on TruthLeadersMag.com

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I Want To Help You Recognise Your Own Creative Potential. + Then Unlock It.

 

You’re a highly creative person. I know this because:

  • you use your imagination to create things
  • you love to think about the future
  • you’re fascinated by beauty
  • you have a deep appreciation for nature
  • you love to create beautiful experiences for people
  • you have a fine eye for detail
  • you really care how people feel and how your actions and emotions affect them
  • you do work that is creative in itself
  • you are an extension of the creative process
  • you’re entrepreneurial
  •  you like to figure out how things work
  •  you like to do things yourself

 

I want to help you to discover and recognise your own creative potential, and then how to unlock it. Once you realise that you’re someone with limitless creative potential, it’s about learning how to use it and bring that out into the world.

 

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UNDERSTANDING THE FEMININE + MASCULINE ROLES IN CREATIVITY

 

Creativity is very much a feminine process. But there’s more to it than that.

 

Obviously, we all have a feminine and masculine part of ourselves. Both of these parts within ourselves need to be balanced in order to be a whole, happy and fully functioning individual. As we’ve discussed quite often, most of our society has been leaning more towards the masculine expression of self, neglecting the feminine, which we are just learning to re-embrace back into our daily lives.

 

In order to manifest we must be able to run our inspired ideas and plans through both our masculine and feminine expression. And in terms of creativity, the two parts of ourselves are expressed as so:

 

Masculine creative energy: is all about taking action – making plans, carrying out information and making adjustments.

 

Feminine creative energy: is where all the creative ideas are received – so we surrender to inspiration, be receptive, introspective, and hold and nurture the seeds of inspired ideas until we can actively bring them out into the world. The feminine cycle generally lasts longer and is what actually allows creative action to manifest into the world.

 

So clearly, there’s a balance between the two parts, one is highly active, and the other is receptive.

 

The feminine is expressed differently in everyone depending on their unique expression, however, some tell-tale signs that the feminine is at play is: Stillness, introspection, darkness, softness, vastness, slow, undulating, strength through gentleness, receptive, raw creative energy, growth through nurturing, emotion, intuitive insights. Those are all expressions of creativity that form within us that are based in the feminine part of ourselves.

 

So when it comes to the reemergence of the feminine in regards to the creative process we are looking at a prominent tendency to surrender to our creative process more, to yield to the flow, and become open.

 

Creatively, the masculine wants to act, he wants to attack things, he wants to be busy, he wants things to happen now. When he is imbalanced or immature he may think that he can use force to create, he may not understand that there is a great deal of action in inaction, which is the core of the feminine phase of creation. Action through inaction.

 

Creativity comes from aligning with your higher-self: Co-creating.

 

The feminine part of us reminds us that creation is co-creation, that we are aligning with our higher-self, listening to it’s instruction, and trusting ourselves enough to genuinely receive insights that lead to inspired action. This is where intuition plays an imprimatur role, as essentially listening to our intuition is hearing the guidance of our higher self.

 

The thing about this “inspired action” is that it comes from quiet, surrendered alignment with the feminine; very little action is needed. Intuition based action is precise, efficient, and without struggle as it is supported by the rhythms that make up creation itself.

 

The balanced creative feminine allows, she acts from intuition, she lets things come, she waits (allows things to gestate) until she is balanced and things are clear and ready to be birthed. She understands and even enjoys the slow or unclear times and lets them move through her knowing that in time all will be revealed.

 

 

THERE IS ACTION IN INACTION

 

The feminine creation phase is about being open, allowing, being gentle with one’s self, and understanding that stillness and inaction is by no means unproductive.

 

The feminine asks us to release our ideals about working hard and sacrificing and invites us to soften into who we truly are and allow the world we desire to manifest around us. When we oscillate into a feminine cycle we are called to embrace and feel our emotions, no matter how extreme or repressed. She knows that our emotions determine our experience and any denial or distortion of our emotional process constipates our ability to genuinely feel the clear truth of our soul. She knows that without a connection to our higher self everything that should be beautiful makes us ache with pain rooted in a blindness that formed from our own self neglect and ignorance.

 

The feminine is raw creative potential and when we align with it we have access to incomprehensible insight and inspiration. When we align with that raw force we begin co-creating with the very source that beats our heart and turns the seasons, it is the seat of creativity itself.

 

The masculine is the energy that carries out the insights that are brought through this feminine process.

 

The feminine is open and gathers, becomes ‘pregnant’ with potential through receptivity, openness and intuition; while the masculine carries out the actions that are needed to ground the raw energy coming through the feminine. He acts upon the ideas that come forward from the feminine cycle, he brings them to life in the material world. Together through the back and forth of feminine and masculine, surrender, and receptivity and inspiration, to refining, building and giving structure through action, the masculine and feminine birth all things into this world.

 

 

HOW TO BALANCE THE FEMININE + MASCULINE ROLES IN CREATIVITY

 

The key is to find your personal balance between the masculine and feminine aspects of your being and realize that it is the feminine aspect which nurtures and sustains the creation.

 

The masculine holds focus and creates the safe and secure space for the feminine to nurture her creation. But it is the feminine which nurtures and sustains the creation. If she is not properly protected, the creation will be thwarted in some way. This is true for creation which occurs at any level of our being or of Creation. There is a feminine presence equal to the masculine and if the masculine and feminine are not properly balanced the creation will be thwarted.

 

On this point of the feminine nurturing and sustaining a creation and need for a balanced dance between the masculine and feminine, the dance is not equal.

 

 

That is, the feminine always give more to the create manifestation than the masculine. The feminine must be willing to give of herself much that a female must give of herself to grow the fetus in her womb to create life. This cycle of conception, fetal growth, birthing, and nurturing the creation until it can stand on it own two feet is true for any creation. It is the feminine which gives of herself through most of this process and this is true for every level of being.

 

So your work here, is to recognize when you are playing the masculine role, and when you are in the feminine.

How do these two work together in your life?

How can you create smooth and balanced symbiosis?

 

What I’ve noticed is that, you often feel like you lean too far into your masculine, but it’s actually that when you do this, when this habit arises for you, you become stressed, exhausted and out of alignment with your true, authentic self.

You have a very feminine, gentle energy, yet your habit is to lean into the masculine too far, in order to be heard, respected and have your needs met.

 

 

HOW WE NEGATE OUR FEMININE IN CREATIVITY

 

In my own life I have taken the time to find a balance in my feminine and masculine expression, which naturally flows over into all areas of life, including creativity.
What I discovered was that we often use busyness which is an over-exaggerated masculine as an avoidance of the deeper, more painful shadow work that we need to do from time to time. Over-masculine busyness keeps us from deepening into creative vision.

 

Psychologist Chuck Spezzano explains busyness:

“Busyness attempts to protect us from the fear generated by our shadow figures, the unconscious mind, and our pain. It blocks out soul level gifts, our purpose and our destiny. In our busyness we are trying to run away from feelings of guilt, failure and worthlessness. We drive ourselves onward to prove we are useful and valuable. Yet dark feelings float to the surface in any moment of respite, so we keep pushing on. Our busyness keeps us too busy for love and bonding that would bring about the same success with much less effort. Instead of moving forward to a new stage we change by slight degrees.”

 

It can feel really strange just to sit and receive “nothing” other than the urge to become more present and more accepting of my life as it was unfolding. The feminine place of creativity gestates and grows even as it seems to “do nothing”. The feminine aspect of creativity waits to see and hear new information from the unseen realms before taking action. The feminine also nurtures what has already been created.

 

Many women develop an over-exaggerated masculine in an effort to make a living.

 

It is highly encouraged to strike out independently. We are encouraged to make our mark separately upon the world. Yet life unfolds all in one piece and it is a feminine trait to realize that we all evolve together. We are part of larger systems that do not always evolve according to our personal agendas. We each belong to a family evolving. We may be part of a working group evolving. And we may be part of a partnership or a marriage evolving.

 

Creations need to be loved and acknowledged, revisited and honored in order to continue living and this incites a revitalized energy and a passion in our inner masculine to do and bring further form to old and new creations from a nourished and revitalized place. Feminine nurturing is what strengthens and inspires our inner masculine to exert the energy to bring our creations into tangible form, and to make them more real in our lives.

 

Come and join me for the 6 week Gypset Mindset mentoring program starting on Monday, where we can continue to delve deeper into this discussion. It would be an honour to have you there, and examine your own sense of femininity and part in the creation process.

 

LOVE xo

 

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What Do You Want To Be, When You Grow Up?

Do you remember when we were little, and grown-ups asked us, what we wanted to be when we grew up?

And often they were hoping for grand answers like lawyer, or doctor or astronaut.

Do you even remember what you wanted to be, when you grow up?

 

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I remember being 10 and training hard to be a mermaid. And this was waaaay before the whole mermaid thing was “in”. I spent hours in the pool, the river, the ocean – swimming underwater, with my eyes wide open, holding my breath until my lungs burnt and I had to come up for air. I figured that, if I could learn to hold my breath for long enough, eventually I wouldn’t have to come up for air anymore.

 

After that dream was shattered by some un-imaginative adult, I decided I wanted to be a back-up dancer in music videos like the ones I saw on TV. Hours were spent every Saturday and Sunday morning mimicking the bold moves, the hip-thrusts and the swivelling of late 80’s – early 90’s hits.

 

Then those awful teenage years hit, and I had no idea what I wanted to, but preferably as far away from this planet and all its weirdness, as possible. Especially my family. God! Is there anything more irritating, embarrassing or weird than family when you’re in your teens?! I think not.

 

As I was finishing school, I had some brief flirtations with the idea of being a lawyer and an actress. By then my ego was in full force and I just wanted people to like me and think that I was lovely. It’s those teen years that mutilate your self-confidence and leave you wanting to be something that you’re not. And by the time I completed my school years, I was ready to pack my bags and head off on my first, real adventure, all by myself, as a quasi-adult.

 

It took me many years of trial and error, of testing many different paths and trying lots of various careers, until I realised that, what I really wanted to be when I grow up, is myself.

 

But what does that mean, really?

 

In a world that’s obsessed with titles and “making something of yourself” – a society that tells us we are never good enough, exactly as we are, without embellishments or fancy accolades, where does “being yourself” fit in?

 

Moreover, how does one create value and earn money in this way?

 

These questions were something that plagued me and kept me awake many nights. Now that I had figured out exactly what I wanted to be, how could I turn, who I am, and my unique collections of talents, experiences, passions and skills, and package them into some thing that’s useful? And even more importantly, that people will pay for?

 

My question was: how could I get paid for being myself?

 

  1. First, clearly, I had to figure out who that even was.
  2. Then, I had to decide what it was that differentiated me, from all the other amazing people, who had similar skills and qualities. What made me stand out?
  3. Finally, how was I going to serve people, and give them what they need and want? What would by my method of providing value?

 

That’s exactly what I’m covering with you in the 4th week of the 6 week Gypset Mindset mentoring program starting on Monday. (Doors close Saturday and there’s only 4 spaces left right now!)

 

I’ll be sharing with you my own story of how I created the job, business and career that I now have and absolutely love. And I will guide you through the practical as well as psychological aspects to creating the same for yourself. It’s such a fun, exciting journey which I know you will just love every step of the way!

 

If you feel drawn, it’s your intuition telling that there is something in here for you…

 

2 Responses to What Do You Want To Be, When You Grow Up?

  1. I think you can learn so much about people by what they wanted to be when they grew up. My dream jobs when I was 0-11 all involved things I’m still passionate about to this day (writing, animals) but all my dream jobs from then onwards were actually things that I picked simply because I thought I would get attention for doing, something I desperately craved (acting, tv host, lecturer) not because I was actually interested in those careers. It wasn’t until a few years ago that the thought suddenly occurred to me that I might be happier if I pursued something that made me happy career wise (a radical concept seeing as everyone in my life has always hated their careers). Now that I’ve realised this, nothing could make me go back to doing something I disliked again, regardless of money, parental pressure etc. Beautiful post, loved the mermaid bit :)

    • Thank you for sharing a little bit of your story, beautiful. I love hearing other’s journeys that bring them to where they are now. Isn’t it funny how we start to veer away from our hearts in order to get the reassurance and praise that we are seeking – instead of checking in to see if WE actually are ok with the decisions we are making! Life. Such a funny, funny journey. I hope the gods are wildly amused be our antics! xo

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