I want to talk to you about self image. It just one of those things that strikes me as something we all need to get a bit more real and clear about. We live in a society where aesthetics and beauty are highly valued and aspired towards. And, to be honest, I think why not. I absolutely advocate that we look after ourselves and make an effort to shine in our own individual ways. I’d rather hang out with people who have a distinct sense of style and are conscious of their health and wellbeing than not. But all that effort put into how we look seems to be leaving some rather vacuous. And it’s disappointing. Because I know there’s so much more to people.
Perhaps society isn’t encouraging us enough to build on our self awareness as much as our outer aesthetics. Perhaps people aren’t seeing the immediate benefits of uncovering each of our uniquely enormous fields of untapped potential. But we are society. So it’s our responsibility. So here I am, writing to you with all of my heart, reaching out and encouraging you to please see beyond the mirror, deeper into who you really are and recognise yourself as being a vibrantly distinct and unique individual. You are one of a kind. There’s no one else like you. Please find out all that it is that encompasses you and show me. I want to see you. The real you.
What I see so very often when I work with clients is that their poor self image stems from a lack of self acceptance. Often people are terribly hard on themselves, usually something that they learnt to do along their journey into adulthood. And self acceptance is impossible without a sense of who you are. When people haven’t developed their own sense of self and self acceptance …… it breeds a sense of insecurity. Which leads to self contempt (wildly crippling) which leads to botox, boob jobs and bald men buying sports cars. Apparently. Far too often people reach for a band aid to hide the problem rather than getting to the core of it. No amount of fake tan, designer clothes or beauty products are going to improve to self image.
Only hustling your soul to come back out of hermitude can do that. Firstly, you have to get to know yourself. And accept yourself. Then learn to like yourself. And then even love yourself.
For sure it’s a journey that in some ways never ends as we continuously evolve and change but a well worthwhile one from which you will reap the benefits for the rest of your life.
Being insecure in who you are and how you look tends to give off an unattractive air. It dulls your natural appeal and charisma and squashes what makes you stand out. People can sense these things. And when you feel like a lesser version of yourself, you lower you expectations for yourself and for your life. This affects everything. Life is reflective so you will always get what you put out.
I strongly urge you to take back your power and to improve your sense self and confidence. But how? I hear you ask…. Where do I start?
What sets us apart from other animals is our awareness of experience. The mind is the mechanism by which we observe and encounter these experiences. The mind tells us….this just happened. It is made to recognise and assimilate the information. We can’t stop it from doing that. We think. Yep, it’s what we do. But what we can do is choose what thoughts to have, and even more importantly what thoughts to pay attention to. 90% of our daily thoughts are merely repetitions. The same thoughts we had yesterday, and the day before and the day before that.
Clean out your mental closet by becoming aware of when you berate yourself in any way. Wether you do it to protect yourself from ridicule or because you simply don’t think highly enough of yourself, just become aware of the thought patterns that arise and make a choice that you want to change them. Awareness of the habit and consciously changing your thoughts to something that makes you feel good will create the inner change. Notice the difference between how you feel when you tell yourself something dissenting as opposed to something uplifting. Choose to change the negative thought patterns into positive ones. You know you deserve to treat yourself better.
Stop comparing yourself to other people. I think this is one of the most detrimental habits that we all have ….. to compare ourselves to others. It’s a terribly effective way to tell ourselves that we’re not good enough because we aren’t living up to someone else’s standards. Create your own standards! Let go of what others are doing, saying and what they look like. Figure out what works the best for you.
Give yourself the approval that you would normally seek out from others. Become self-approved. The Daily Love has plentiful articles on this here. Start looking within for answers and trusting that the answers you come up with are the right ones for you right now. This will centre you and bring you an inner peace that permeates the rest of world.
I implore you to examine your idiosyncrasies and discover your authentic self. Because that is the most attractive, beautiful, delicious and inspiring version of yourself that exists.