You know that feeling. It’s sneaks upon you when you least expect it. You’ve had a wonderful day. Your latest blog post / work appraisal / gig / client meeting / coffee date has gone superiorly well and you’ve settled into your favorite nook to catch up on some social media.
Ooooo, what great photos all the people you follow on Instagram post! Oh, what wonderful success your fellow friends, acquaintances and entrepreneurial buddies are showing on their Facebook feeds! Ahhhh, how beautifully the latest bride in your circle is glowing with health and happiness. Wow, do they really have this many followers in such a short time!?
And then you start feeling it. A sinking of the heart. That niggling sensation in your stomach when a little troll whispers into your ear, “Why haven’t you achieved as much / been as successful / fallen in love with the ONE / lost those extra pounds? Why aren’t you doing equally or better than him or her?”
Yep, it’s those pesky comparison trolls creeping into your mind and heart, telling you that your not good enough. That YOU are not enough.
So what do you do?
A) Go to the fridge and console yourself with a little treat. Because, just for a moment, it makes you feel better.
B) Reprimand and punish yourself with negative self talk and degrading habitual habits and thoughts around your self worth. Like “I suck!”.
C) Recognize that you are on your on unique path and exactly where you are supposed to be.
The reason why we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind-the-scenes with everyone else’s highlight reel. | STEVEN FURTICK
The best thing you can do in this case, is develop a healthier a sense of self and work on your own self love and self esteem.
Focus on YOU.
Instead of diluting your energy by watching what everyone else is up to, focus that same amount of time and energy on yourself. Do things that fill you up, uplift you and light you up. Is there a project that you’ve been meaning to start, but just haven’t made the time for it? Do it now! Do you crave some support and nurturing in your life? Reach out, talk to friends, family or work with a coach who can help you work through some blockages. Haven’t been taking care of your needs as well as you could? Take your exercise and nutrition to another level, go to those classes you’ve always wanted to try and get a massage.
When you realize how much you have to be grateful for and all the wonderful things that are happening in YOUR life, there isn’t a chance for the trolls of comparison to sneak up on you. Because your too busy counting ‘dream come true’ and ‘wishes fulfilled’. The best way to develop a practise of gratitude is to make it a habit. Every morning as you stretch out in your bed and wake up, recount all the things that you’re super happy and grateful for right now. Even if its just the sleep you just had, or the sun shining / rain falling out the window. Do the same as you go to sleep at night. Scan your day for all the highlights and blessings that have befallen you. You will take these good feelings of gratitude into your sleep and dreams with you enveloping your in fulfillment and abundance.
Acknowledge your PATH.
No one has the same journey in life. Even if one walks in the exact steps of their mentor, there are no doubt different forks in the roads. Your road is yours alone, and even if it doesn’t seem like it sometimes, it holds just as many opportunities and adventures as anyone else’s path. Every day is yours to find something to create, something to learn, and something to find happiness in. Comparison takes you away from seeing any of that because you’re too busy concentrating on someone else’s road that you’re never even going to walk on. Stop trying to jump the hedges and stick to your path because it leads to your destination. It may have different bumps and it may take the long way, but you’re going to get to where you’re going as long as you keep walking. Promise. You can find out more on that in one of my most popular posts ever written What’s For You Won’t Pass You By.