{language warning} We Teach What We Most Need To Learn. Today: On Money, Joy, + Deservability.



We teach what we most need to learn. I read this in an Instagram post today. And I thought ‘damn straight we do!

As a lifestyle coach, I see this happening in every single coaching session. I’m seeing in my clients exactly what I was learning/ breaking-through/ changing in myself.

Allow me to give you 3 examples.



Case In Point No. 1.

A handful of months ago, I decided I wanted to take a look at the way I handle money, how responsible I am with my finances and what my relationship with money is, in general.

I knew I have plenty to learn in this area, and while I’ve moved forward in leaps and bounds over the years, I could sense there was still some nasty limited beliefs and programming lurking around in the background, affecting my own financial abundance.

So I made a commitment to myself to learn, to grow, to stretch and to change. I bought a few books, opened up some new savings accounts, and started clearing out the nasty little habits and beliefs that were holding me back.

Within a few weeks, I attracted not 1 but 3, yes 3!, coaching clients who were struggling with money, and wanted to work on their inner belief systems around this hot topic. Clearly, in order to increase their own financial wealth and abundance. Which all starts with the right mindset!

The universe had heard my call, loud and clear, that I wanted to work on money, so she sent me the work, straight to my doorstep. No getting out it now! Ha!

Everything that my clients are working on, and learning, I am working on and learning as well. We may be at different levels. We may even be at different income levels. But the INNER WORK and the shifting of beliefs and programming, is the same.

And since we are a collective consciousness, every breakthrough, every change has a lasting ripple effect across all of humanity. So the inner work that my clients and I do, to transform old expired conditioning, is not just for ourselves. It touches all of you.



Case In Point No. 2.

Joy. I’m a believer that EVERYTHING in life that we do, should bring us joy. Simple right?

Wrong! Sometimes I catch myself doing things that don’t bring me joy in order to:

  • Please others.
  • Be a good girl.
  • Do what’s expected of me.
  • Fulfill someone’s needs.
  • Avoid guilt.
  • Etc.

As this is something that I’m aware of, it’s become less and less of an issue, and most of my life centers around being joyful and doing things that bring me joy.

Until one day, during coaching calls with two different clients, who explaining to me the following:

“I feel like work has to be hard, that feeling joyful means you aren’t working hard enough and that you should feel guilty for that.”


And yes, they are right. This is some deep-rooted shit (I mean, conditioning) that’s going on here!

Many, if not most of us, have been taught that a life of suffering, of working our hands to the bone, until we are burnt out, is the only way to create anything meaningful. That nothing is worthwhile, unless it has come from sweat and tears.

Well, NO!

This is unacceptable.

And again, we do the inner work to clear those beliefs. Need a little reminder on how to do that? Here’s a ‘how to’ I prepared earlier.

Again, since we are all connected as a collective consciousness, we can ALL do this work and make a difference. What varies is simply the awareness of these old belief patterns which we transmute when we dig them up, and replace them with new habits.

Habits that make us glow with joy and laughter and glory.

Cause we are alchemists like that baby!



Case In Point No. 3

And this one is a big one: deserve-ability.

It’s one that I stare down the face of every so often: mostly when I’m taking life to a new level. When I’m ready to jump from a new height. That’s when the fears and doubts around deserve-ability rear their ugly head.

It’s shows up in the mask of fear of the Unkown. But it’s actually about not knowing that we deserve the things that we dream of.

Just like they do, oh-so-often for my clients.

They want to know if it’s ok to earn or charge more. They want to know if they should go for that road-trip their heart so yearns for. They want to know if they should talk to their partners about the stress they’re feeling. They want to know if it’s okay to ask for more when they need or want it. Or to say no, when they don’t feel like doing something.

God-damn-it, of course it is! Do it! You deserve this. And everything else that you can possibly imagine.

(Btw, I love god, and god loves cursing, so it ok. And I’m just in one of those moods right now… This topic gets me all revved up and passionate!)

Who are you to deserve everything you dream of? Who are you to deserve being paid the sum that you desire for your work? Who are you to deserve having the body, family, life, house, experiences that you see in your minds eye? Who are you to deserve having all that you want?

What a load of BS.

Who are you not to?

You are a divine being, the creator of your universe. Who are you not to conjure anything you want? It’s all yours already!

What are all those negative emotions and feelings for? They’re definitely not here to serve you. They’re here to control you and keep you down! So fuckem!

You deserve it. Unequivocally. Indisputably. Absolutely.

And THAT is how we teach what we most need to learn. Today: on money, joy and deservability. Tomorrow, on something else (like fear. Fear is a massive one too!). If you want to work with me and get those limiting beliefs and patterns out in the open to clear, email me.

Love always xo

Image source.

17 Responses to {language warning} We Teach What We Most Need To Learn. Today: On Money, Joy, + Deservability.

  1. It’s funny how we seem to (WRONGLY) believe that we aren’t good enough for our dreams and tithings we love, enjoy and desire. I wonder where this deep seated belief comes from? Anyway, it definitely something that we had to change NOW. it’s our generation that can change he world by changing our beliefs and perceptions. We are lucky!

  2. Ah yes! That makes me think of this lovely quote by I-don’t-know-who:

    Some people come into your life as blessings, some people come into you life as lessons.


  3. Loving this post. :) I love the whole deservability part. YES I DO deserve all this love and joy and happiness in the world!

  4. I love this post Vienda. Thank you so much for sharing. I definitely agree that people and things show up to teach us the lessons we most need to learn. I can definitely relate with the financial and deserve-ability lessons. Big love to you darling x

  5. Vienda, you are like always in time :)
    I feel it more and more – we all, everything is connected and the universe is showing it to us. We only have to see it!
    Thank you for sharing this wisdom with us!

  6. I’m loving that it’s touching you in all the right ways Katie. Nice to just be honest and share how things are with one another. xo

  7. There is a lot to unlearn, but we can make it a really fun process by not taking it all so seriously.

    Life is a game. We loose some, we win some. We are constable learning and transforming ourselves.

    This is all part of the process, and we have a choice on how we interact with it. Either from a place of curiosity and eagerness to learn, or from a place of feeling dragged down by it all.

    Keep smiling beautiful! You’re getting so close to your own truth now.

    Vienda xo

  8. Yes to all of this. I’m so working on the it has to be hard thing. Every time I hear someone say something pointing in that direction I cringe now. Ugh, no thanks…I’m all about the effort and ease sweet spot!
    The money thing is also huge. Sometimes I feel like there’s so much to unlearn. Sigh…

  9. Vienda- all I can say is that you make me feel human. I’ve never read words that describe exactly how I feel from a day-to-day basis it just makes me feel at ease knowing that may be my brain and my life it’s okay it’s okay to feel these things so thank you!!! :) :)

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