How annoying is it when you look around, and see other people have exactly what you want? They have the type of career that you have only dreamed of. Money appears to be falling at them from every direction. Amazing things happen to them all the f#*&ing time. Oh, and they have the hottest, nicest, most genuine boyfriend / husband / love ever.
It’s so exasperating!
Lucky for you, this maddening sensation is a golden opportunity for you to turn your life around, into the one that you truly want.
Firstly, while comparing ourselves to others isn’t healthy; admiring others is. So, let’s say those people you’ve been eyeing off enviously with all their treasures, to-die-for wardrobes and sexy friends, became your inspiration, instead of devastation. With one simple change of perspective, you’ve already changed the way you view and feel about yourself and the world.
This tiny transformation is so simple; yet unbelievable powerful. By deciding that the people who have previously irritated you, can now become a source of learning and inspiration for you, means that all of a sudden you have upped your game, and are that much closer to having the things that you want.
You’ve changed your vibration around it from rejecting them, because they have what you want; to embracing them, and opening up to those things, that you too, want.
Secondly, we get to view these moments of green-eyed jealously, as clarity points. Whenever you feel annoyed about someone else having something that you want, see it as a wake up call for more clarity. That thing that they have, that you want, is calling you, too. Recognising this, means that you can start to ascertain the kind of life that you desire.
It also means that, in the end, you have ultimate responsibility and the power to either lead a good life, filled with beauty, happiness and abundance; or a miserable one, filled with complaining, unhappiness and lack.
When you know what you want, you can start manifesting it. But, hold up! Why have they been able to manifest it, and you haven’t? Good question. Here’s 10 reasons why some people are better at manifesting than others.
1. They love themselves.
People who are good at manifesting have learned how to love themselves. That doesn’t mean that they buy themselves flowers every Saturday and religiously go to yoga. It means that they have come to appreciate their own energy, their uniqueness, the vibration that is theirs and theirs alone. It means forgiving themselves and fully accepting themselves, exactly the way that they are.
2. They believe they deserve the best.
Many (if not all of us) have an underlying, sneaky little belief system that says “I am not worthy” and “I am not good enough“. This means that we don’t believe that we truly deserve the things that we want. Clearly, this is a problem. If you want to manifest something into your life, but secretly don’t actually believe that you deserve it, then… it’s highly unlikely to show up.
The reason why we have these underlying beliefs is because — twofold:
- Somewhere along the way, someone told you that you weren’t good. Remember being a little child, and being scolded for doing something wrong? Yep. In that moment a part of you decided “Well, that must mean I’m not a good person“. This is no-ones fault. It’s part of our fate and destiny in this particular time of our evolution to overcome childhood conditioning by coming back to ourselves, and remembering what we really are: whole, beautiful, perfect and loveable in every way.
- We have been taught to worry about everything. The reason why we worry, is because we believe worrying means we are taking positive action. We feel as if doing so can change the situation, when in reality it cannot. Worrying is exhausting. It drains you mentally and physically. And in the end, nothing gets accomplished except worrying.
Stop worrying. Start paying attention to your self-talk and change it from negative to positive, just like we did when we turned our aggravators into inspirers, earlier on in the post. And finally, start to just decide, that you are deserving of all the you imagine and dream of. When you decide it, it becomes true for you.
3. They are in vibrational alignment with what they want.
Your thoughts and feelings are not equal to your vibration. They’re merely effects of your vibration, but they get filtered through your beliefs. If your beliefs aren’t aligned with truth, then your inner perception of your vibration will be a distortion of your true vibration, so you won’t perceive yourself accurately. You may think you’re resonating with a certain energetic frequency like abundance, vitality, or love, when the truth is quite different.
How can you become aware of your true vibration if you can’t blindly trust what you’re thinking and feeling?
We all have blind spots, myself included. In order to become aware of those blind spots, we need to take a step back and observe what’s really coming out of us. What are the real frequencies we’re broadcasting, and how do they compare with what we think we’re broadcasting?
4. They’ve worked through their blocks + fears.
This is a really big and important one. When we are wanting to manifest something, but we actually have fears around those things that we want to manifest, then they’re simply not going to come. I go into this topic more deeply on Day 3. of the Free 7 Day Manifesting Course. Essentially, it’s about getting to know your fears (and more often than not, it’s actually fear itself, that we are most afraid of) and allowing yourself to feel them. Then, once we really know them, we dissolve them, because we recognise that they don’t truly exist and can be transformed at any time.
5. They know what to ask for.
So often we think we know what we want. But usually those things are incredibly superficial, and being the fickle human beings that we are, as soon as that thing has been done, we want another thing. Most of our wants are actually just the tip of the iceberg of our true desires. Our desires stem from the feelings that we want fulfilled. As physical beings, we are incredibly sensual, and even though many of us are stuck in our thoughts, it’s what we feel, that really touches our hearts, souls and memories.
People who are good at manifesting, ask for how they want to feel. They say “I want to feel abundance in every area of my life. What that looks like is having more than enough money to buy delicious, healthy food, live in a place that I love, and connect with like-minded spirited souls, every day.”
6. They know how to trust and let go.
Surrender is the biggest key to manifesting anything. It means that, once you’re clear on what you want, have cleared away any block and fears around that thing, and asked for it, you simply let it go. Many of us believe that if we want something bad enough, we constantly, repetitively have to ask for it. As if that will speed the process up and give us what we want, faster. This, of course, is not true. It is when we let go, and trust that exactly what we want and need is coming to us at exactly the perfect time, that manifesting starts to work in its magic.
7. They know how to receive.
So many of us have been taught to give, give, give because it’s considered polite, and to make other people happy, but very few of us have learned how to receive.
As I begin to examine this deeper, I realize for many of us receiving involves vulnerability. When we give, we feel in charge. When we receive, we feel open and vulnerable. This is an incredibly important aspect to be aware of. Give feels like an action word; receive feels like something passive. Yet this perspective is a mistake. Giving and receiving are yin and yang, the equivalent of the infinity symbol—looping back and forth, neither side larger than the other, both integral to the larger whole.
Learning to lean in and feel comfortable with receiving, means that the things that you choose to manifest, can come easily to you.
8. They can easily clean up their vibrational field whenever they need.
Some people tell me about how they shifted their vibration (thoughts, feelings, actions) to align with financial abundance, but they’re still manifesting scarcity. They often end up deciding that manifesting doesn’t really work.
However, the truth is that they are vibrating scarcity through every pore. Their mannerisms and choice of words always betray their true vibration. It doesn’t matter what you’re thinking in your head. It’s about the feelings that they choose to emit and share with the world through their interactions. It’s easy to say one thing, but feel another.
This incongruence means that manifesting isn’t going to work for them. Your true vibration isn’t what you’re thinking or feeling in your head. Your true vibration is what you’re broadcasting out to the universe.
People who are good at manifesting know this. Which brings me to the next point.
9. They shift their focus on what they want.
When we are constantly paying attention to the things we don’t want by complaining, and not finding solutions, or talking about all the things that we lack, we are constantly putting out a message that says the opposite of what it is you want. This step is so simple, but it does take practise: Stop complaining. And focus on all the good things in your life.
10. They practice stillness / presence /meditation.
When we are deeply connected with ourselves, the things that we want, and that are meant for us, they easily flow through our experience. We are not attached to the having or not having, but rather, joyful observers experiencing the sensuality of life, in all its variations and forms. Manifesting works easily, when we are detached from the outcome, while still knowing what it is we want.
The easiest way to do this is to have some kind of mindfulness practice in your life. There are many to choose from: surfing, walking, meditation, yoga, playing music. Whatever tunes you into your own inner vibration, and allows you to feel and flood your heart with love and appreciation of what is, will do.
Manifesting is such a beautiful and fascinating aspect of life — a learning to co-create with the higher energies and your spirit. It gives us an awareness of the incredible limitless and expansive beauty that we get to call life.
If you feel called (and since you are reading this, you obviously are) you might like to take part in my 8 Week course: Manifest More.
Not sure about manifesting yet? Get a taste-test with my free course, to begin:
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Wonderful post! So insightful, especially no. 7 – blocking gifts by being uncomfortable with receiving is a huge one for me. Thank you! xo
Yeah, that’s a good one. I think we often don’t even realise that we are blocking things by forgetting to be open to receiving them. But self-awareness is the first step, so, this will obviously change for you, very quickly. Happy manifesting! xo