Something I think about a lot in our modern climate of gender neutralization and separation is what needs to happen to heal and reunite these two symbiotic energies in all of us. There’s something about the way that I see women speaking with great disappointment and disdain about men, and the way I hear men label women as “whores’ and “bitches” that tears tortuously at my heart.
There are a lot of people in the world, who are projecting a lot of shame and pain at each other, both men and women. This isn’t about gender. This is about people with every assortment of genitalia who are hurting and blaming.
I believe this can change. It must change. We cannot go on like this.
I believe that change must come through the feminine. As intuitive, loving guardians of the heart, we must lead the way back to love.
When we heal and connect to the feminine energy within all of us, separation and victimhood will dissolve. We can come together as a symbiotic collective force that has space and inclusion for all.
This is how we can begin: 10 tips on how to (actually) be feminine.
1. STEP INTO YOUR POWER
Most women believe that to be powerful they have to be controlling, loud and assertive. That’s one way, but it’s the masculine way.
The feminine way is to emanate your personal truth without wavering.
It means feeling all the feelings and listening to the inner whispers even if they feel wild and uncontrollable. Feminine power lies in being a force of nature that simply expresses itself — from rage to pleasure — through your body.
When you trust in the power of your feminine, you access the power of the entire universe.
2. LISTEN TO YOUR INTUITION
For too long we’ve been told to refer to external validation to make decisions.
Stop allowing logic and reasoning to limit your ability to truly live a spectacular life.
The feminine within all of us has an innate “knowing” — an internal compass — that is always guiding us on our highest path. Own that wisdom and back yourself 1,000000%.
You’ll always find out in hindsight why you had to do the (sometimes super weird or scary) things you had to do.
Listen, I know if feels overwhelming sometimes. But the more you do it, the more you will step on the path you are supposed to be on. Trust me on this.
3. CONNECT TO YOUR 🐱 PUSSY
Last year when I was in London I went to one of Lacey Haynes’s Pussy Gazing events where we well… gazed lovingly at our 🐱. Would you believe that was the first time I had EVER seen mine? And do you know how I felt? UTTER SELF LOVE.
Our lady-parts are directly connected to our emotional world, our creativity, our intuition and our ability to SHOW UP in the world.
You cannot connect with your feminine without connecting to you 🐱.*
*Ok, so this one is indirectly for men: some pussy worship never goes astray. 😉
4. HONOR, LOVE + SUPPORT OTHER WOMEN
We are long past the days of comparing and competing with other women. We’ve figured out that this kind of separation harms us more than it protects us.
Women loving women makes us all more powerful, happier and kinder.
The relationships you have with other women are a direct reflection of the relationship you have with yourself.
Women spending time together in a relaxed way releases oxytocin, the love hormone. This is the hormone that makes women happy.
How you relate to aspects of other women is a direct reflection of how you relate to those parts of yourself.
Healing your relationship with women will open your heart and make you a more trustable woman.
5. YOU ARE MORE THAN ENOUGH.
So many women believe they’re not enough. That just being yourself is TOO MUCH.
Lies. Lies created by a society that wants to control and manipulate ALL HUMANS into tiny manageable cube-shaped pieces.
Rebel. I dare you. Rebel by choosing tO fully love and accept yourself wholeheartedly. By backing yourself. By refusing to squeeze yourself into circumstances that just don’t fit. By saying NO more than you say YES.
6. YOU ARE A PARADOX.
You are all the things you are, and that’s perfect.
The feminine is the paradox of extremes all rolled into one human body. The sooner you accept that about yourself that further you’ll get.
7. ‘NO’ IS A COMPLETE SENTENCE
And ultimately, when you fully own your capacity to say NO — to set boundaries — you’ll develop boundless self-worth.
Martyrdom does not equal love.
It equals masochism and resentment.
8. CHOOSE RELATIONSHIPS THAT EXPAND, INSPIRE YOU, AND THAT ARE RELATIONALLY SAFE.
Anyone else is a ‘NO’.
Maybe it’s time to heal any patterns and blocks that stop you from attracting that kind of relationship. You may carry a story that is all you’re worth.
[Check our my course SOVEREIGN to learn how to clear that.]
9. LOVE YOUR BODY.
Your body is your the only home you truly have. When you live and care for your body: move, nourish it, care for it, listen to it, rest and sleep enough, you embody your feminine power and RADIATE beauty.
Cultivated love from WITHIN and you will be matched x 1,000 by the world outside you.
10. HEAL YOUR RELATIONSHIP TO MEN.
If you want to the world to be healthy you have to heal your relationship with men because (just like with women) your relationship to men is a direct reflection of the masculine parts of yourself.
Each one of us is mirroring what is going on in the world and one thing that hurts me more than anything is the great divide that is currently being committed between women and men.
It is not helpful to carry around wounding and project it onto each other.*
*The same goes for men: you HAVE to heal your relationship with women.
Things cannot go on the way they are.
I get it. I really do. It hurts. Things have been done to you. Me too. But to them too. No one is innocent here.
So let’s heal it so we can end this painful cycle forever.
Around here, we do things a little differently...
Sign up to join the 10,000+ subscribers to my popular love-drenched notes sent directly to your inbox.
You're signing up to receive emails from Vienda Maria