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finding HOME…

finding HOME…

  The truth is that, with all my Earthly wandering and wondering, my deepest longing is to find is a place I can call 'home'. The concept of having a home, feeling at home, and 'home' as a safe space has always been challenging for me. It's one of the wounds I have to unravel in this lifetime rooted in a childhood where 'home' was a place I wanted to continuously escape.    I’ve found 'home' within of myself. I feel so anchored and safe and supported as a human being in the world which makes it easy to flit around. My body is my first and primary home. And I've created many 'homes' for myself.   Slowly and slowly... my time in each place is extending as my nervous system is recalibrating into deep relaxation... and I am finding myself yearning and longing for a sense of having landed in a place that holds my body and trinkets and love.   More recently, two years in Mexico. And now 18 months in Brighton. It’s been sweet, this little home of mine. Safe, gentle, calm, easy. But the blood in my veins and the marrow in my bones is begging me to continue inquiring. This is not it. I hear the winds say.   At the close of September before the cold weather drapes us in its shrouded darkness again,...

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What was the hardest thing? & 10 other questions

What was the hardest thing? & 10 other questions

  I always knew I was going to create a life on my own terms. I also knew that to do so I had to be a little strange, outlandish, run against the current, have people disagree with me, and dislike me. I was ok with that. One of the greatest gifts that being parentless has given me is the freedom to command my life as my own. I have the privilege to create a life that I please out of my values, beliefs, and inner knowings fuelled by oodles of determination, stubbornness, and magnificent dreams.   It was inevitable that I would end up working for myself. I was a terrible employee: I would do that bare minimum; I felt utterly invested and dispassionate about my employer's goals and aims; I questioned the working hours because I knew I could get more results faster and resented having to drag them across a full working day. More than anything, I wanted space and time to actually enjoy my life. I've always been of the opinion that this sweet, short, wild ride on Earth is supposed to be a sensual, playful, joyful one. Served with a side of soul-growth.   But building a business, from the ground up, on a shoestring was no walk in the park. It required me to dig deep, face some of my biggest shadows, and...

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A snapshot of what I studied + did to work as a women’s mentor

A snapshot of what I studied + did to work as a women’s mentor

  I was always a dreamer as a kid, lost in my own fantasy world. I spent the ages of 10 and 11 training to be a mermaid by swimming endless lengths of our neighbour’s pool while holding my breath and sliding my body in wave-like motions so I could propel myself forward without arms. Knowing what I wanted to “be” when I was a child was a foreign concept. But what I did know was that I wasn’t interested in any of the options society offered me.   Here’s a snapshot of what I studied and did to end up working as a women’s mentor:   I completed a Bachelor of Science in Psychology largely out of self-interest but with the potential bi-product of becoming a psychologist at the end. I loved this 4-year course. Amongst many other things it gave me the ability to be analytical; to do real research to find the truth of things; an in-depth understanding of human behaviour; and the knowledge that we are always going to be our best case studies, so my teachings and practice are wholly based on what I know to be true for myself.   I went on to work at global music and film festivals for several years which are the ultimate study of human behaviour in intense environments and under extreme conditions which...

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time management, work + productivity ~ redefined

time management, work + productivity ~ redefined

  I recently spoke about how I manage my time and run my business in one of my mentoring groups and it created quite a stir, so I wanted to share this conversation with you here.   Did you know that 70% of the population isn't supposed to be consistently motivated all the time? Yet many people are looking for a magical time management system to manage and organize their motivation in a linear way.   The key to good time management is deprogramming yourself from the way you think time works.   This means teaching yourself to believe that you can still be successful even if you don't work in linear, dogmatic blocks of time, that are the same every day and every week.   Maybe, like for me, your motivation comes in waves. Sometimes it's there and fully turned on. In those waves, I can get more done in 1-2 hours than most people do in an 8-hour workday. Sometimes it's not there and I surrender and trust that this is a time I am meant to be more inwards, reflective and gestating in preparation for the next wave.   The concept of time management is such an interesting topic because, and bear with me here, what is time even, aside from a social construct to help us measure our presence and...

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Brighton + London — half-day in-person mentoring — this Summer.

Brighton + London — half-day in-person mentoring — this Summer.

  Blooming and flourishing — as an internal experience rather than a performative act — is something that has captivated me in particular across the past year. I had so many opportunities to look at the choices I make over and over again with curious inquisition to check in with myself whether they actually breathe the goodness of life into my bones, or if they are things I do because I presume that there is no other way. I face in myself a desire for life to feel good beyond what it looks like on the outside and the more that I lean into this I find so much of my external life is falling apart.   Which means change and disruption and movement and softening evermore into the unknown. And it means I'm leaving the UK, for a little while at least. This also means that this is the last time I'm offering in-person mentoring on this luscious slip of land.   If you’re in Brighton or London, and you’d like to hire me, here’s what I’m proposing:   — 1/2 day face-to-face mentoring session in Brighton or London at my/your home, a cool cafe or co-working space, whatever location is most convenient for you. During this session, we can: map out a creative plan/biz project/online course for something BIG you...

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How private mentoring with me works, now.

How private mentoring with me works, now.

15 years ago when I received the letter of invitation to continue my studies and undertake a Master in Clinical Psychology so I could become a practising psychologist I halted. In part, because I wasn't sure I had accrued high enough grades to invite an offer; and in a larger part because I wasn't sure I wanted to be a psychologist anymore.   Something about the way that we were expected to categorise and label unique, individual human souls didn't sit right with me. From my own experience with various forms of therapy, there is a limit of how far into the psyche we can reach. Talk therapy is incredible when we haven't had any more to explicitly share our deepest fear, traumas and shame. It opens up a portal for release and transformation.   It also summons the potential for getting stuck in the past, reliving all those things that happened before that hurt over and over again sliding the individual firmly into a narrative of victimhood instead of offering up an incentive that what is really important is what we do with those experiences to grow, to heal, to evolve.   From my understanding, clinical psychology has progressed somewhat since then. There is more room to include the individual, to see...

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my 6:2 day juice cleanse for clarity, hydration & radiance

my 6:2 day juice cleanse for clarity, hydration & radiance

  I firmly believe that outsourcing your health and wellness to a body outside of you, especially one that is rooted in capitalist structures like the State and governments is literal insanity. I have no idea when this happened, that human beings stopped taking responsibility for their own bodies and handed them over to corporations. But I think if there's one thing that everyone should have taken away from the past year is that the most valuable thing you own is the health of your own body, mind and soul.   Life has felt stagnant in unfamiliar ways though so much is happening in the undercurrents, so I keep remembering that one wise soul who told me that contraction always precedes expansion. I don’t recognise myself anymore, the past year had me swaying in the chaos of discomfort but there are glimpses here in my own personal dark magic with uncertain endings, of a new version of me that is to slip out when she is ready.   Seasonally, I tend to do a cleanse of some kind to alleviate the sense of disillusionment I feel with the world at times and expedite the rush and flow of life to move through my body which tends to contact during periods of growth and change.   Around the corner from my...

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a world is ending… breathe out. let it go.

a world is ending… breathe out. let it go.

  Some years are made for fighting shadows, some years are made for dreaming dreams, some years are made for wholly living, some years are made for falling in love, some years are made for heartbreak and some years are the dark, rich spaces in-between that tie all the other years together.   I read somewhere that astrologically we are in a kind of limbo: the old world has come to an end, but the new world has not begun yet & so we hang in this strange in-between liminal space not knowing quite what to do. A world is ending. The way we used to live life no longer fits. Breathe out. But we have no map for what comes next. Let it go.   There is a new way of life and a new world rising. But in its emergence, we are meeting the parts of us that have been broken and our old stories of pain and separation are cracking. We are simultaneously activating higher states of consciousness while surrendering the illusions of control and power as well as shedding old beliefs and feeling a sense of emptiness and directionlessness. It's hard to know how to navigate the in-between...the limbo we are facing.   The answer is to commit to the frequency of your desire...The how comes as a byproduct of you being...

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morning and evening routines for inconsistent ppl (like me)

morning and evening routines for inconsistent ppl (like me)

I grew up in an environment that was highly controlled by people who feared life. It meant that from the moment I was self-aware enough the only thing I wanted was freedom. Liberation from being told what to do by people who were living out their unresolved pain within a society that has an unnatural addiction to productivity.   As soon as I was able to I vehemently stood against the routines, structures and systems I was taught in favour of gentler, more intuitive and cyclical living. I believe in the intelligence of nature above the intelligence of man. I believe we all have access to that intelligence. It is body-led, not mind-led.   The world loves to tell us what to do. In return, we have been conditioned to look for external guidance and validation on everything we do. From the moment we enter the school system if not before, we are taught the invalidity of our own independent thoughts and feelings. So we look to others for how to do things.   Information at our fingertips like Google has stolen our trust in ourselves and our bodies. Or, more correctly, we have handed over our relationship with the wisdom of our bodies to the need to have everything answered and validated by an external...

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how I make 50% of my income (it might not be how you think)

how I make 50% of my income (it might not be how you think)

One of the things that changed my life the most was changing my perspective. When I started to see the benefit, the gift, the lesson, the growth in the challenges that life gives us, when I decided that life was happening for me, not to me, I really started loving it. In 2014 I took those tools and experiences and turned them into a course. I made £10k from it in the first year I ran it.   In 2017 I created two more courses on topics that dramatically shifted my life. One on clearing the subconscious blocks and beliefs that stop us from living out the expansion possible for all of us. Another on how to live an intuitive life. Both of them were made up of media files adding up to less than 2 hours and were so fulfilling to make. I was finally able to teach core topics that my clients and readers asked me about in an accessible and effective way. They made me around £15k the first time I ran them.   Since then I’ve made several other courses that continue to bring my best personal life lessons and teachings to the people who need them and in return bring in income including Affluent, Her Way and more. Now, online digital courses make up at least 50% of my income.   The Heartful Biz, originally a live...

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