I woke up the other morning, my eyes wide awake, heart beating fast, mind running at a zillion miles per second.
“Iwonderhowmanyreadersmypostyesterdaygot. OoooIbettergocheckmyemail. ShouldIwriteaboutmyfriendsawesomecourse? Iwonderifmytonesoundedauthentic. Whattimeofthedayisthebesttimetoconnectwithreaders?” Etc, etc, etc.
It was 6.30am.
And I was like. WTF is going on here! I never, ever signed up for this! The reason I have created my business and life the way that I have, is to do the opposite. To live from a place of spaciousness. With freedom. Time. Peace. Calm. NO thinking at a million miles an hour.
So what brought this on?
It was brought on by a very short-lived and minor divergence from my path. You see, ever since I launched the new look of my site two weeks ago, I’ve had well-meaning people from all sorts of different walks of life, kindly add their two cents, on how I can make my business better, what I should be writing about, what strategies to include, what action steps to take and so on, and so on, and so on.
Though their words and efforts were meant kindly, it kind of rocked me off my centre. I’m always up for suggestions, there is no work that doesn’t have room for improvement, everything is always changing and evolving. But in their words, refinements and suggestions, I lost myself.
I lost why I do this.
My why, is to connect with you beautiful like-hearted souls that know that there is more to life, than the bland prescription society has given us, and want to explore what that is. And how to create it. I want to share my own journey on how I do this, my experimentations, and what I discover, and help those of you who want to join this crusade alongside me. We have so many more choices and possibilities available to us than we often realise and recognise. My purpose is in unveiling this, and helping you choose a different path. One that fulfills you in all ways.
But somewhere between upgrading my website, and sitting here before you today, I lost that thread a little. And it felt awful. I started posting words and sharing things, that in part, were me. But they didn’t feel like me because they were tainted and influenced by the words and opinions of others, that, while their intentions were good, are completely out of alignment with who I am. And the way I do my work.
The way I generally work is with my muse on one shoulder, whispering the words that I write, in my ear, and my understanding of how grammar and structure and practicalities all work together on the other, so I can share with you what I’ve got. There’s no strategy. There’s no system. It’s pure, unadulterated inspiration. A sharing of words, worlds and souls.
As soon as I realised what was happening, I stopped. And for a while I just wanted to delete everything that had just happened – that didn’t feel like me. But I didn’t. I waited. I forgave myself for being led astray. Gave gratitude for having experienced this – a spell which countless others fall under. And then I wrote this. My confession: that I erred off my path, as we all do. And that I’m back. The real me.
It’s so good to be back.
Around here, we do things a little differently...
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Welcome back beautiful xx
Thank you so much my lovely! It’s SO good to be back! xo
So happy you’re back to the magical you xo
It’s so funny how we can get mislead by people with good intentions. It’s so good to recognise it and even better to come back to oneself, don’t you think!?
Totally agree! It’s my main business and life practice now too.
LOVE!! So easy to do, so intuitive to pull yourself back so quickly. xx
Yes, isn’t it! It’s surprisingly easy… But I’m just so grateful that I heeded that inner twinge of things not feeling right, and redirected my path. It all just feels and flows so much better this way. Thanks for your insights beautiful Alex!
I know those voices well! Thank you for sharing : ). I just got back from a we in the middle of nowhere (=filled with wilderness!) and that really helped to clear those voices out and hear mine clearer again. But then again, how can we guide others if we never fall off the path ; ). Big hugs, Karina
❤️❤️ thank you Karina!
Ah, sweety- it’s SO easy to fall into the pure panic of the online business world. Your intuition is strong and so is your heart and no matter the circumstances, you will always be led back to what’s meaningful and important – because it’s such a strong part of who you are. And that’s why we love you so!
Thank you my love. It was a really good experience as it made me take a step back and reassess what it is I am wanting I achieve and how. So good to set new intentions about the guidelines of how I want to show up in my life. Here’s to integrity forever! xo