There is a thick, sweet mist that hangs out in the early morning hours, heavy with the promise of heat ahead waking me up the past few days. The syrupy sensation rouses a concealed part of my brain remembering lives lived in hot, tropical climates from a small island in Fiji with only natives for 2 months, to university in FNQ in Australia to Thailand and Bali in Asia, to Goa and Kerala in India, to the jungles in Belize, Nicaragua, Costa Rica and Mexico.
For the past 10 days while recovering from this strange sickness I have been on a wildly psychedelic nostalgic carousel ride trying desperately to recall at what point I disconnected from my inner wildness. It was a compromise I had to make to function in the world in a way that lines up with the fragmented structures and rules that make up our society. I feel like I can’t trust my own mind as I reminisce on a life that was etched into the fleeting momentariness of life with idyllic pleasure sidelining the challenges of never really knowing where I was going next or how I was going to make the money to exist in a world that requires currency.
I love making money. It’s a fun, creative, expansive pursuit for me. Learning to handle my finances, value myself and my work, and grow to a certain level of affluence has been such a gift for me. It is one of the ways I have reparented myself. By meeting my own practical needs. Yet I resent the way our survival is based on a system of exchange that is designed to care for so few. I recently invested in a course on money to grow my knowledge and wealth but led with the question of how we can approach the pursuit of wealth and the comforts, choices and freedoms that it brings with the integrity that we can do so in a way that is inclusive and can ultimately uplift everyone. Sadly, our educator gave the same answer I have heard over and over again. Either you make the system work for you or let the system override you. In short, there is no alternative. This is what we have to work within the here and now.
Not having the energy nor the capacity to “do” much the past 2 weeks, I have immersed myself in a world of documentaries. ‘The Velvet Queen‘ is the most exquisite and breathtaking nature documentary I have ever seen in my entire life, further deepening my recent yearning to reconnect with my inner wildness and go live immersed in nature again for a while. ‘Fools & Dreamers‘ tells the incredible story of how degraded gorse-infested farmland has been regenerated back into beautiful New Zealand native forest over 30 years. ‘The Earthing Movie‘ brings science to meet the indigenous knowledge of why we need to interact with our lands skin-to-earth. ‘A Simpler Way‘ follows a group of people exploring building and living in a community in the hinterland of Australia. ‘The Art of Life‘ filmed in Hawaii is a documentary about the art of living outside of conventions, in deep integrity with one’s essence. There’s a theme here. Can you see it? It’s part of the reinvention I am attempting to access in myself, which is less about becoming, but rather returning to my truest essence in a way that is not isolated from nature.
In these deep inner quests, I have discovered renewed gratitude for my work. The fact that I get to take several thousand people (and growing) on journeys of my philosophical musings and discoveries. The fact that my healing becomes your healing. The fact that I can teach and share what I come to understand and learn on my life journey… is such a magnificent and delightful pleasure.
My focus this year has been The Mentor Training. Alongside that, I am developing and updating some of my shorter courses. ‘Affluent’ and ‘Her Way’ will get a turn in the sunshine again this year, both run live. I am working on a new one ‘Renew’ — on how to carry yourself through a season of becoming (as I am right now) alongside bridging the gap between fear and creating/doing what you’re called to — after your enthusiastic response to my questions last time.
I am also thrilled to reveal that two new private client spaces are opening up starting in June. There’s more information about mentoring with me 1:1 here and if you’re ready to immerse yourself in your own inner journey press reply to this email and we can explore the next steps together.
These past few weeks I am dreaming up a way to take all I have created professionally over the past 8-10 years and see if I can integrate it into a way of life that is made up of days lived mostly outside barefoot, connected to the Earth, in a place or places that allow me to revel in the wilder parts of my nature. The parts of me that spent most of my twenties chasing festivals due to the simple way of life and community those events offered me. The parts of me that were teased for taking my shoes off as soon as I could from younger than 3 years old. The part of me that remembers an ancient remembering of who I am and where I truly belong.
Let’s see, where that takes me, and us. Thank you for being here.
P.S. Thank you, for all your enthusiastic responses to all of my questions in my last email. There was an emphatic ‘yes’ for both the Renew idea, as well as potentially adding a subscription option to my writing, so I can take you deeper down the rabbit hole with me. A writer whom I admire and also happens to be one of my readers, Emily, suggested I include journaling prompts or even guided journaling practice with the paid version of my emails so I have been sitting with this idea and allowing it to formulate itself further. I had to postpone all my dates due to my health but look forward to seeing where this adventure takes me and will report back promptly with funny and embarrassing insights.
Around here, we do things a little differently...
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