life update: red cappuccinos, warm grand-fatherly wisdom, friend-dates that end in kisses, inequality turned into appreciation, money & self-worth & internal reorienting + more…
“What was your miracle today?” The text reads.
I just sat down in my new favourite cafe, a small red, white and pink oriental/hipster/millennial vibes place that’s cute and kitsch with an obvious identity crisis, laptop in tow. I pull my phone out and read those words, words we have been sending back and forth to each other. An invitation to look for the miracle that happens each day.
Yesterday’s miracle was a delightful Greek lunch date with a man I consider just a friend which poured over into an art gallery and music adventures through Cape Town’s city centre streets and ended with a kiss.
The other miracle was the deep sleep that followed.
I order a ‘red cappuccino’ from the stocky African man behind the counter, flustered and sweating in his busyness — essentially a shot of strong rooibos tea made like a coffee — and return to my seat at a bench that has small cards labelled with “for laptops”.
I don’t notice the elderly man who sits down next to me until he turns and asks “Where are you visiting from?” I smile at him and say I live in the U.K. wondering how my Europeanness stands out. He tells me his daughter lives there naming a town in Surrey that I do not know.
We chat about travel and Cape Town, how the world has changed from recognition in the past three years and how social media is doing a number on human beings.
I tell him about my philosophy and my guilt.
That we are not meant to have so much information to filter through our minds, that I choose not to watch the news nor engage in the mad goings-on of the world stage because if/when I do it does irreparable damage to my mental health and that I feel guilty that by making this choice I am not offering a positive contribution to the world.
He presents a warm grandfatherly wisdom-filled smile.
“I think it’s the opposite. I think you are doing far more good for the world by refusing to engage with the drama on the world stage that is not a real part of your life because it means you can be present with what is real. The best thing you can do is make choices about the kind of life you want here and now. Is that a privilege? Sure. That’s the gift you were given. Make use of it.”
Solaced and grateful for his words I smile and thank him before the conversation is hijacked by a runaway dog who scampers into the cafe followed many confusing minutes later by a stressed dog walker with seven other dogs attached to his waist. My elderly companion finishes his coffee and says goodbye.
Maybe that was today’s miracle, I think.
After he leaves I weigh his words and how they fit into my current perspective of the world and my place in it. These past few months what I’ve really learned is just how privileged I am. And not to take any of it for granted.
Seeing people suffering without access to basic resources and human rights has lit a fire in me.
Not the fire you might think.
I do not think omgoddess, life is so unfair whydoIhavealltheseresourcesandtheydon’t. I should have/take less.
No. I have known for a long time that life is ‘unfair’. Life is unjust all the time. People die. People hurt. Life is unequal. Just look at nature.
The fire that has been lit in me was that, while I am alive, I might as well make the most of what I have available to me. And in making the most of it, I can also be generous with what I have.
When I appreciate what I have, I am abundant. When I feel abundant, I am free to give back more of myself and my resources.