So much of life is optional, not mandatory.
But we forget that, don’t we? We inflate ourselves with a grandiose succession of ‘shoulds’ and ‘musts’ and find ourselves slipping beneath the surface of why we came to Earth in the first place. I am absolutely certain that we are here to have a profoundly enjoyable experience. To sip on the ecstasy that is a life fully lived. And yet…
The past few weeks I keep bumping up against the fact that my entire system is currently rewiring itself. Every time I think I’m done, every time I impatiently try to move on, life puts me back into my place, into the present moment and makes me feel every emotion until I am fully purged. I’ve been in a season of doing the slow, incremental, unglamorous work of questioning one belief system at a time.
Redefining my life, my work, the way I use my time, my existence piece by piece. Remembering anything is possible when I work through patterns and conditioning like an archaeological soul excavation. I’ve had to let go of so much and questioned myself so deeply and had to teach my nervous system that it’s safe through it all one breath at a time.
I keep surrendering to these waves of needing to be still and rest as new information settles into my bones. All these initiations of deeper understanding and wisdom, a continuous cycle of death and rebirth, as old ideas and paradigms are dying in the face of new ones blooming. I find myself incapable of doing anything productive in these moments that sometimes last for days and I keep having to remember to surrender to it. To not fight or resist it.
There’s a rewiring on fundamental topics happening:
- How I nourish myself and what that means in the face of a wellness industry that thrives off convincing me to follow trends
- The intersection of worth, value, output and income and how we have been fed the idea that they are conditional
- How nature, the feminine and creativity are one and the same and require uncompromising protection right now
- That how and where we invest our time is where we invest our lives…
This is why I am excited to present to you: BOUNDARIED. A 2-hour Zoom workshop with me and my spellbinding friend
Claire where we teach you to have the audacity to map out your own hours and the self-authority to do something different to the cultural norm.
9am LA / 12pm NYC / 5pm London / 6pm Barcelona / 4am Sydney
2-hour Zoom Workshop
Everything is changing. Everything is changing.
And it feels… terrifying. But also, so good.
We are all biologically and intrinsically motivated by the desire for more. More of the good stuff: more ease, joy, love, pleasure, abundance, time, presence, connection… Because by nature we are pleasure-seeking beings. It’s an urgent need for satisfaction. An inbuilt reaching for our own evolution.
Just like all of you my life and work are ever-evolving, shifting, growing. I am currently in the process of scaling my business and it is stretching me in ways that I haven’t been stretched before. I paid the biggest tax bill ever in December and the VM business became an LTD company because it outgrew my little sole trader setup. I hired a new accountant and set up payroll, and then went ahead and soft-launched two mentoring programs for 2022 to my ‘Her Way’ peeps… And then days later, after a few conversations with people I respect whom I shared my niggling feeling that something wasn’t right with, cancelled those programs, refunded my students and went back to the drawing board.
It was both exhilarating and frightening. Birthing something from inside you that is bigger than you, is no small feat. I’m leaning into some really new terrain and going all-in but my nervous system is saying “are you sure this is safe?” so there’s that inner struggle and the work of soothing and supporting my body so it can hold space for the expanse of what I am calling in.
And it reminds me that there are always two things at play in our evolution:
1. The conscious, surface desire for more. To expand, to grow, to evolve.
2. The subconscious, interior desire to feel safe. To stay with the confines of what it knows.
Every time we learn and grow we face an inner struggle that comes with the discomfort of stretching and growing pains. The unravelling and deconditioning of beliefs, systems and structures, while holding ourselves in a foreign no-man’s land to leap forward into the unknown more-ness of our desires.
I’m so enthusiastic and also, so so so confronted by the largeness of what I want to offer the world, an extension of the insight, healing and growth I have myself moved through the past two years, and I won’t pretend that I don’t feel some impatience and frustration with myself and the non-linear path this journey is taking me on as I wait for the nudges that move me forward. I have to let go and trust.
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